Avoiding Energy Vampires | Health in Life and Business

Energy Vampires Sunset
Pivot Points – Core Concepts for Self-Understanding, Transformation, Growth

Avoiding Energy Vampires

Today’s Core Concept – Your Energy
When considering tools, tips, techniques for helping us figure out life and live better, I think it’s very helpful to distill to simple, basic concepts that are more powerful and get to the point as soon as possible. Getting to the heart of things, so that when we understand the heart, the core concept, we can make more effective decisions, with better understanding.

One of these core concepts is around our energy – considering what/who drains our energy and what gives us energy. You’ve read about this concept before in discussing the real meaning of extraversion and introversion. If you think extraverts are “talkative” and introverts are “shy”, you still have the old understanding. Here’s a quick lesson/refresher (it’s relevant to our discussion to touch on this, even if you already know):

As described by the personality type (Myers-Briggs MBTI) experts in “Do What You Are”, Extraverts focus their attention and energy on the world outside of themselves. They seek out other people and enjoy lots of interaction, whether one-on-one or in groups. They are constantly (and naturally) pulled to the outer world of people and things. Extraverts get their “batteries charged u” by being with others and usually know a lot of people. Differently, Introverts focus their attention and energy on the world inside of themselves. They enjoy spending time alone and need this time to “recharge their batteries.” Introverts try to understand the world before they experience it, which means a lot of their activity is mental. They prefer social interaction on a smaller scale – one-on-one or in small groups.

So, basically put, Extraverts get their energy from spending time with others. Introverts get their energy from spending time alone. And there is a spectrum of extremes for this – most of us fall somewhere on a spectrum for being more or less introvert/extravert – we are usually a bit of both.

You can see how having an understanding of your intro/extra-vertness could help you make choices that support what you need. Either taking time to surround yourself with people who energize you, or being mindful to give yourself quiet time to contemplate and recharge.

There are other ways that we gain and lose energy. Having an understanding of these things can again help us feel better and live and work better.

Here are some additional Energy-givers and Energy-takers to consider:
People  Whether you’re an introvert or an extravert, there are people who will support us, love us and help us be better – they help us be our true selves, they don’t ask for other and they don’t set their expectations upon you. Then… there are people that I like to call energy vampires – they suck the life out of us. They demand a huge amount of our emotional, mental, spiritual – and sometimes physical – energy. They have their own expectations that they put on you, without regard for who YOU truly are. They want you to fit into their mold.  Can you think of an example of either kind of person – either someone who supports you, or someone who sucks your vital life force? How have they helped to shape your life? Can you imagine how it would feel to cut ties with the vampire? And how it would feel to have more of those people that support you?

Work  How many of us chose our first careers because of feeling outside pressure? Feeling that we were doing what we SHOULD do? Doing what was right, responsible, acceptable? I know I sure did. I took my fine arts degree right to the middle of New York City and worked for large institutional banks. Makes sense, right? The corporate work was what I believed I should be doing, it was acceptable and parent approved. But the work sucked my energy. I had no real purpose. I had people who wanted me to do things, and I did them, so I was serving a purpose to them, but the work didn’t really matter. I wasn’t doing anything that made the world better, that made a real difference in people’s lives. And, more importantly, I wasn’t working from the inside-out. I wasn’t using my real gifts and strengths. I wasn’t even in a situation where I was going to better understand what my gifts and strengths were. I was working inside, spending the best part of the day in a controlled air-flow building, under artificial light, 200 feet above the earth. Just the environmental situation was completely out-of-alignment for me. Consider your work now. Does it feel like time flies by when you’re doing it? Or does time drag on? Are there ways you can incorporate what you really love – things that light you up – into what you’re already doing? Or can you carve out some time in your day to do these things? Is it time to consider bigger change?

Self-beliefs  What we believe about ourselves is HUGE in how our energy moves. If we believe we don’t deserve success, joy or freedom in our life, our energy will support that belief – it’ll stay slow and stagnant. If we believe we DO deserve all these good things (gentle nudge: if you’re reading this YOU deserve success, joy & freedom), our energy shifts. Our energy moves differently. We move differently in the world. We expect different things and we experience and receive different things. It might help to look at examples other than ourselves to better understand this. Consider two people you’ve known for a long time – one, who’s done well for themselves and seems truly happy and a second person, who’s not done so well and seems to forever have a black cloud over their heads. What does each one believe about themselves? What are they worthy of? What kind of relationships do they have in their lives? What do they do for work and for fun? Now, understand that either of those people could choose to believe something entirely different about themselves. They could change their lives completely, if they decided to accept a different truth. Have you ever looked at this for yourself? Have you ever considered that you can change the course of your life, by changing these beliefs for you? If you’d like to have some extra guidance and prompts with this, grab my bonus exercise: Shift Your Story – Start choosing a better path today. It is a short & fun activity that will help you get clarity on where you are now and how you can completely shape your future, by changing your beliefs and intentions.

In addition to the Shift Your Story exercise, you can download this PDF that has journaling prompts for what we cover in this blog post today. As you journal through, you’ll better understand how you can better support your own energy – feel better and be more effective. Grab the PDF HERE.

Be sure to share this with anyone you think could benefit from a better understanding of how their own energy works and better understand what they need to thrive.

Thanks – have a great day!
~Katy
Katy Moses offers coaching sessions via Skype to help you heal, release resistance, stress & anxiety, gain greater clarity, calm and flow to help you feel confident in your skin, as you move into alignment with your strengths, gifts, passions & goals. Do you have your sessions booked? Book online now

Rejection is Awesome! And Other Surprises.

Rejection is Awesome!

…that’s a phrase that NEVER crossed my mind, until recently, when I experienced rejection. I’d been in an interview process to be a consultant for a company that helped other companies find just the right employees for the right team in their company. I LOVE doing work like that, making connections, bringing people together in a perfect (or close to) relationship. But, I did not make the final cut, instead was told that my experience did not align with what was their ideal. To be completely honest, that rejection did sting a fair amount. The work was really appealing as was the supplemental income.

But then I took some time to pull back and look at it, without the emotion, without feeling the attachment to the outcome of the situation and I started to see the silver lining (but there were still lingerings of hurt, if I continue to be honest. It’s hard to be entirely detached when you’re a person who feels deeply.)

So often, times of rejection take a hold of us and start to shape and define what we believe of ourselves and what we believe we are worthy of deserving in our lives.

This work would have put me in daily conversations with people who are in companies that sell heavy industrial equipment, farming machines and trucking sales, large, heavy, metal things that men with very old-school smarmy, salesy ways of being work for. Did I really want to be working with this kind of client? One who is almost entirely motivated by profits? Who don’t really care what their products are used for and if their products are something that would bring real benefit to their client? They didn’t care about the big picture and who they were helping – or hurting – with their work. I’d not taken time to consider all these details before…  Did I really want to be working with them, helping them?

The answer was clear and simple.

No.

The remnants of hurt melted away and I saw what came from that closed door. I could turn away from that compromised existence, working with people who don’t really care about what they do, and instead I could work with people who DO care about their work, because they’re doing what they LOVE, working with JOY and PASSION and really making a difference in the world. People like YOU.

I dodged a bullet there. While the supplemental income would have been a blessing, I see that there are other ways to make that happen without compromising my own gifts and desires.

So, how can you reframe rejection for your own life?

In this week’s healing meditation in Project Joy, I talked about rejection. We did healing around it, allowing the attachments to it to release and to allow our beliefs around rejection to be re-framed into an understanding that is more productive and encouraging and empowering.

We use rejection as ‘evidence’ that we are failures and that we’re not as good as others, because we didn’t fit our round, curvy selves into that square hole.

Rejection can often paralyze us. Instead, allow it to be a loving message from God, from the universe, that we’re not meant to be walking down that particular path at the moment. There is another perfect path laid out for us, so we need to keep moving. Keep a curious mind, let ourselves feel all the feelings – the hurt, the sadness, the loss – don’t force yourself through it – and then, when you’re ready ask “what is next?” Get quiet, find time for prayer, meditation, journaling to see what answers come. Talk through it with a friend. Look for what else is around you, next to you, on your horizon. As time passes and the hurt becomes less, it will be easier to see the other opportunities that are there.

So often, times of rejection take a hold of us and start to shape and define what we believe of ourselves and what we believe we are worthy of deserving in our lives. We use rejection as ‘evidence’ that we are failures and that we’re not as good as others, because we didn’t fit our round, curvy selves into that square hole.

YOU are Awesome – you’re a blessing and you’re here to touch lives of others, to make them better. Allow times we’ve been rejected to be seen as a loving, knowing hand, steering us to a better place.

Take a couple minutes to consider past rejections and how they helped shape your life. Can you find the blessings that came from that ‘lost’ opportunity?

I’d love to hear about it! Let me know what comes up as you do this – it might help to do multiple times.

xoxo, Katy

P.S. Join us for weekly healing, mindset support and connect with other truly awesome ladies in our group Project Joy | Healing and Breakthroughs for Entrepreneurs. Watch this webinar so you can discover 5 ways energy healing can help grow your business (and give you the side effects of feeling better) and experience a healing session for yourself. Sign up HERE and get instant access to the webinar: 5 Ways Energy Healing Can Grow Your Business

Poppies Loved Rejection

When the World Gets in Your Way | Upper Limit Problem

In the battle for good, sometimes fear gets in the way

Have you found yourself on the brink of a breakthrough, or experiencing something REALLY amazing and then – BOOM – something comes and rips the rug right out from under you?

Most of us have beliefs around how much of something good we can experience in our life – how much we can accomplish, how much success we can have… And when we start pushing up against that invisible energetic barrier – either through taking some big, brave steps, feeling amazing, experiencing really great things, meeting lots of lovely people, as examples – we trigger this barrier. We “know” what we “truly” deserve in life, and when things start getting bigger and better than we are comfortable with, we – consciously or not – will self-sabotage things to keep us in that same comfort level.

Think about a time where you caught yourself thinking, “Hmmm, things are going TOO well, they can’t continue on like this. When is the other shoe going to drop?” This is classic Upper Limit thinking.

It keeps us small and it keeps us safe. And it stinks, especially if you’d really like to live a life of purpose, acting on your God-given gifts, showing up as authentic you.

So what to do about it? 

Here are a couple easy actions:

  1. Visualize yourself PAST that barrier, living a life that isn’t constrained by it. What do you do? Where do you live? Who are your friends? What do you eat? What choices do you make in your day?
  2. Acknowledge that this is happening and give it some curious, detached thought. Why is this happening? Why is it holding you back? Is it trying to protect you? Send some gratitude to that fear – it’s doing two things for you. It’s trying to protect you, and it’s showing you EXACTLY where you need to go. When you can consider the fear and take action in spite of it, you’re on the right path.

So…If I do these ^^^^ things, I’ll be cured forever?

Unfortunately, no. I’ve had some mentors use the phrase, “New level, new devil.” As you continue to step up your game and show up more and more fully, you expand and grow and find yourself bumping up new energetic barriers – your beliefs have expanded and now they’re ready to expand again. It’s life. It’s continued learning, self-understanding, gaining wisdom.

Read more about the Upper Limit Problem in Gay Hendrick’s book, “The Big Leap”

The video below talks about some Upper Limiting happening in my life today (post-run, excuse the sweat). Soldier on, sistahs!

And, could you use some more support in your life & biz journey? Hop on to my LIST and receive value-packed, spam-free content that will make things better. xoxo

Get a Better Night’s Sleep Tonight

relaxing image

Sleep-e-o, Sleep-e-o… Wherefore art thou, Sleep-e-o?

How do you get your star-crossed love – Sleep – back in your bed every night?

You’ve got the time, the place, the good intention, but sleep seems to be a bit of a struggle. Busy brain, restless body, weird dreams… And it’s ridiculous that the more tired – and overtired – you are, it’s even more difficult to find ease with sleep.

Take 10 minutes to listen to this audio and prep your mind and body for bed. Feel free to do it if you wake up in the middle of the night to help get you back to bed.

Getting Ready for Bed Audio

You can listen right here, or you can download to your device for easy offline access anytime.

Other tips for a better night’s sleep:
– Turn off screens at least an hour before bed time.
– Be sure to get good exercise during your day.
– Eat foods and drinks that help you feel nourished and well-energized – not over-stimulated or shaky.
– Along with the steps in the audio, take some time to stretch and calmly move your body before bed time. Incorporate nice, deep breaths to calm you.
– Do journaling to get out anything that may be tickling your brain.
– Avoid negative news or intense-energy movies later in the day.

What other ways do you like to get yourself settled before bed? I’d love to hear about your routine and what helps you make the most of your night’s rest time. Shoot me a note at Katy@katymoses.com

I hope this supports your health and feeling all the goodness.

Love and Hugs,

Katy

Katy Moses coaching
My name is Katy Moses and I work with women like you who are ready to grow your businesses in your own way. You are too-often struggling with overwhelm, feeling like you need to incorporate all the things the experts say you should into your to-do list. Instead, I help you work with your unique skills and strengths to better leverage your action-taking and so you can experience real joy in work and life. Book your free Discovery Call today – Click HERE.

Weekly Self-Care

INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT ENERGY HEALING?

Weekly Healing Sessions

The past year has been eye-opening as I’ve worked with brave, intrepid ladies around the world who have been willing to experiment with me to see how we could use reiki to help with healing, releasing fears, deflating stress, and turning up the calm, clear-headed JOY in their lives. We’ve tested new techniques and have had really incredible results. Over and over again, we found the negative outside pressures melting away and calm becoming the dominant force within. 

As I’ve continued my journey, meeting with and working with more and more women, I’m more compelled to work with even more women, so they can experience this as well – this healing, this improving – FEELING BETTER. We all need to show ourselves some love and attention, especially when we demand so much of ourselves, when there’s so many things we want to do in our day, in our lifetime. 

We know that self-care is critical to the big picture of our success and I’d love to introduce you to the newest way to do this together.

Imagine weekly energy healing for you, working with your goals, your intentions – your specific needs, and in the convenience of your home – or wherever you are, whatever you’re wearing, whether you’ve showered or not. 😉 How could this change things for you, to include this weekly energy healing into your non-negotiable self-care routine? 

This is exactly what I’m cooking up with the Mindset Project. The mission is simple: to keep this experience simple, loving, healing, supportive.  This will be a group experience, where we’ll heal together, every week and you’ll be invited to share – anonymously or as yourself, within our private, safe space. You’ll be welcome to check in and share your journey and any shifts with the group. You can participate as much or as little as you’re called to at any time and, even if you don’t actively participate, the intention will still be that you will receive the reiki energy healing every week, in the way that serves your highest and best good. 

Sound compelling? I hope this calls to you. If so, click HERE to learn more and sign up as we’re starting next week – and don’t hesitate to send your questions my way today, just click reply. 

Here’s to feeling better and better every day & I hope this day is an amazing one for you. 

~~ Would you like to receive some reiki for self-healing today? Click HERE, and be sure to click the SUBSCRIBE button for updates!