Time For a Good Cry?
the tragedy is that we don’t encourage each other – and ourselves – to let go, cry and express our hurts. The negative effects of years of holding in are real.
Posts
Deep Relaxation | Project Joy – 16 April 2019
Try this today – self-guided Relaxation exercise. For more support and guided reiki healing audios, join Project Joy.
1 Killer Action to Turn Your Business Around Quickly | The Power of Doing Less
1 Killer Action to Turn Your Business Around Quickly
The Power of Doing Less
Hey there, entrepreneur-friend – tell me about that big, long to-do list you have, that includes ALL the things that need to be accomplished in your business. If you’re like me, you have multiple lists in multiple places – in journals, on the backs of a worksheet from that class, in Evernote, Trello…you have a list-making-habit.
These lists include activities like updating our website, reaching out to that person who was interested in learning more about our biz, making new social media posts, responding to that inquiry, figuring out how to link PayPal or Stripe (agh, which one do I choose) to your products and services page. The list feels like it’s ever-expanding and like it has to be comprehensive, complex and we MUST get it all done if we have any hope of not-failing. If can feel like this list has a lot of power…and it can feel overwhelming.
So then, when we sit down to work or when we’re creating our schedule, we see this massive list and we’ll pick an activity to do. What do you find yourself choosing first from this big list?
I’ll bet a bit of money that you choose something like updating your website or writing a blog, or creating a social media post first…or maybe you’ll go do laundry or clean your bathroom? Something that still allows you to be productive while still staying ‘safe’. And you’ll let other more-scary client-getting activities – things like responding to an inquiry and doing a FB live video slip down to a lower slot on priority ladder. Am I right?
We fill our days with unnecessary busy work because it still feels like we’re doing what we should be doing and that should be good enough… right?
I know what you’re doing because this is too often where I’ve found myself.
When sitting down to work, I’d look at all the things I needed to get done for my business and I’d choose something important – but something that didn’t reach out to people – I’d tweak my website and logo endlessly, maybe order business cards and brochures, and I’d never do the more vulnerable scary work like send an email to someone who I was pretty sure I could help, or create that video talking about the work I do with my clients. And you know what? I struggled to get clients. My choices were not serving who I really wanted and I found my savings and confidence dwindling down as I was trying to make my business work.
So here’s the thing I realized: Having the big, comprehensive list is great. It’s good to know what you’d like to accomplish, but from that list you need to choose what is most going to help you step into the life and business you’ve been dreaming about. What choices are going to move you toward the success you want? What are the most potent activities you can do this week and today to grow your business?
Here’s your simple, powerful take-away action-step:
Take 3 things from your big list and make them the only three things you need to accomplish this week. The key is – and here’s where I push your comfort zone – at least 2 of these 3 things need to be about getting more clients and creating a solid foundation for your business. The third thing can be something more administrative, like working on your website or a logo.
How’s that feel when you think about making this 3 Thing to-do list? For me it’s usually a mix of good fear and excitement and relief. Relief in that I only have to do three things, fear in that I’m going to be pushing the limits of my comfort zone with at least 2 of those activities.
If you need some ideas for client-getting activities, here are a few to get your wheels turning:
- guest posting on a friend or colleague’s blog
- being of service – not pitching, being of true, generous service – in Facebook groups
- referrals from past clients
- giving free talks in your area
- following up with warm leads
- adding a section in your newsletter about working with you
- sending dedicated pitch emails to your list
- connecting in person and via phone with colleagues to talk about business and share leads
- hosting free webinars
- add your business information in my email signature
- sending quality, free content to your email list, on a regular basis
Which of these activities feel do-able and like something you could easily start with to get the ball rolling? Star, circle, highlight, make notes about those that spark your interest. Again, use the following questions as a filter – the more honest you can be, the more quickly you can turn things around:
- What is most going to help you step into the life and business you’ve been dreaming about?
- What choices are going to move you toward the success you want?
- What are the most potent activities you can do this week and today to grow your business?
The idea of the 3 Things List is to help you simplify, reduce overwhelm and really assess where you’re putting your energy. In truth, it’s helping you prioritize the actions that are going to make the biggest impact in your business – and it probably means you’ll be doing 2 more REAL client-getting activities that you would have in a busy-work-only week.
When you can do less of the busy work and do just a few real ‘scary’ activities every week, you’re going to start seeing real results.
This is where your business starts to turn around and where you get a taste of the success that has felt out of reach despite all the hours you’ve been putting in. You don’t have to burn yourself out to be successful and you don’t have to have your public image (website, social media, etc) perfect before you get started.
Start by getting into more conversations with people, use your gifts and passions to help them and be open to inviting them to work with you and to enjoy an amazing experience as your client and as your customer.
You have so much to offer your peeps. Make it easier for them to find you, know you, like you and trust you, because that’s when the fun magic happens on both sides and they gladly buy from you. Let’s allow more of this good stuff in.
So, before you move on – what are the 3 Things you’re committing to this week?
Be sure to comment below with your list of 3 Things and if you found this helpful, please share it!
~Katy
I work with women like you who are ready to grow your online-based businesses. They are typically struggling with overwhelm, feeling like they need to incorporate all the things the experts say they should into their to-do list. Instead, I help them work with their unique skills and strengths to better leverage their action-taking and so they can experience real joy in work and life. Receive email updates HERE.
And, if you’re ready to stop feeling stuck and start rocking your business, learn more about getting support to help you get there with this introductory coaching package: Get Unstuck
Curing Comparison | 4 Steps to Let Go and Get Back On Track
It can be stealthy, subtle and sneaky.
It can infect your thinking…
without you ever having any idea that it is there.
Comparison. Comparing who you are, and what you have, what you do and what you’ve done against what you see others being, doing and having done.
How do you compare against your neighbor, your coworker, your best friend?
Whether consciously or not, I’ll bet a LOT of money that you’ve taken a look at yourself and rated yourself relative to where somebody else is.
So, is this a terrible, cursed thing to be doing?
Yes, and no.
Let’s start with the no. Why is comparison NOT the root of all evil?
Comparison can be healthy. We see our friend making a positive change for their health – choosing better foods, incorporating exercise into their day. And we see that things are changing for them – they’re feeling better, stronger and its having ripple effects in other parts of her life. She inspires us to reflect upon our own choices and we make some changes that will help us also improve our health.
Cool – that’s great. Comparison leading to inspiration and positive change.
That’s one example. We can likely name a few other examples where comparison has led to inspiration – seeing someone else achieve something despite the odds can give us “permission” to achieve for ourselves.
Then let’s talk about why comparison might truly be the worst thing that could happen to you.
- Limits your beliefs of what you can achieve. You see that someone else has what you want and you see all the reasons they’re different from you and you’re able to make a ‘reasonable’ excuse for why you can’t have the same for you.
- Gives a home for negative self talk. Perhaps it’s cultural, but we have a tendency to talk down about ourselves to ourselves. We’ll be critical of ourselves in ways we’d never be to our friends. And when we then compare ourselves against another person and how perfect and amazing they are, it is easy to draw contrasts to our lives and fuel that negative self talk.
- Allows us to rationalize why we can’t do something – “well, I don’t have what she has, so I can’t achieve similar””My idea isn’t as profound as that””I won’t have the impact he does””I’m not as strong of a speaker/writer/thinker/expert…”
- Stalls us out – Procrastination and paralyzation (I just need to learn one more thing, need to do one more re-write, need to do a little more research, need to wait for the weather to improve, need to wait for the kids to be older)
The other thing about the negative side of comparison, is that we often don’t realize we’re doing it. It’s insidious and quiet, yet starts that stream of negative words into our brain and can affect and infect all we do and think – leaving us feeling limited, less than, not good enough, not ready.
Pssst… you don’t really think you can leave that perfectly good steady job, that pays you perfectly good money that allows you to pay all those bills to go chase a child’s dream of being a travel writer, do you?? That’s ridiculous, only an irresponsible idiot would do that….
You recognize this voice, don’t you? It sounds very rational, it keeps us “safe” and makes us feel like if we doing anything outside the norm, we are risking our lives. Sometimes this voice wins, but sometimes we know that, however ‘rational’ that voice might sound, we have a calling that we cannot ignore, so we have to move forward and make change in spite of that voice.
So… how to break past it. How to shake off that voice and the negative feelings that can come with comparison?
Luckily, the ways to get past that negative voice of comparison are simple. They do require some focus and action taking, but if you’re ready to step into your bigger vision, you’re ready for focus and action.
The 4 Steps to Curing Comparison
- Get present
- Develop your vision
- ‘Turn up’ the vision
- Make it a non-negotiable YES
The beauty of this is how good it feels. Even if you aren’t feeling a strong call to make a big life change, but want to shake that habit of comparison, you can do it and get more centered and operate from a place that is more positive and true to you. Sounds good, doesn’t it?
- Get present.Basically, this is about finding yourself in a calm, peaceful state – free of regret and anxiety. You may typically be in this place, or know how to get there. If you need help, here’s a simple meditation to get you into a place of calm presence, ready for clear thinking.
- Develop your vision.What is your dream? Your passion? Your calling? Grab papers, markers, pens, and draw it out, write it out. (If you need to get your juices flowing, maybe you need to get out for a walk or a run, take a shower, whatever works for you.) What does it look like? When will it happen? What needs to happen in preparation? Can you do less than you think in preparation? What actions can you take immediately? And then, what does it FEEL like? What does it feel like to think about this reality for you? Write down how it will feel and how it will change your life once you’ve made this happen. (If you don’t already have a strong, big vision that’s tugging at you, start small. Is there a new hobby you’d like to try? Some place you’d like to visit?)
- Turn up the vision.
You’ve written down how it will feel and how it will change your life to make these changes… Write and/or think some more about what your life will be like when this happens. Get into juicy details… What kind of people will you hang around with? What will your home look and feel like? What will you be doing? What will you be doing with your free time? What foods will you be eating?… Things like that. How does that feel? Write down any more feelings that come to mind and take some time to read each one and let it soak into your body. Where is it in your body? Feel it and then turn it up so that feeling radiates into every cell and even beyond. After you’ve done that for the individual feelings, do it for the vision as a whole and really turn it up, so it’s radiating from you.
- Turn it into a non-negotiable YES.You’ve done great work here. Now, take action. You know what your vision is, take action today. I’m not going to tell you what to do, because you already know. What I can do to support you is to tell you that you now have permission, you now have the assignment, you can choose to make this real for you, today.
Ok go.
With love,Katy
- Develop your vision.What is your dream? Your passion? Your calling? Grab papers, markers, pens, and draw it out, write it out. (If you need to get your juices flowing, maybe you need to get out for a walk or a run, take a shower, whatever works for you.) What does it look like? When will it happen? What needs to happen in preparation? Can you do less than you think in preparation? What actions can you take immediately? And then, what does it FEEL like? What does it feel like to think about this reality for you? Write down how it will feel and how it will change your life once you’ve made this happen. (If you don’t already have a strong, big vision that’s tugging at you, start small. Is there a new hobby you’d like to try? Some place you’d like to visit?)
- Get present.Basically, this is about finding yourself in a calm, peaceful state – free of regret and anxiety. You may typically be in this place, or know how to get there. If you need help, here’s a simple meditation to get you into a place of calm presence, ready for clear thinking.
Katy Moses offers Entrepreneur Energy Coaching sessions via Skype to help you gain clarity around your life and business, identify blocks, behaviours and beliefs that are limiting your momentum and to help you release and heal so that you can move forward, with calm, clarity, strength, alignment, joy and inspired action. Do you have your sessions booked? Visit KatyMoses.com for more info on sessions and to book a clarity call.
